I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
He was having this drunk emotional breakdown and I was just trying to cheer him up but instead fell and dumped the whole pickle jar on me
It was cool though because he was fine afterwards and somehow I convinced them I did it on purpose...
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
Randomize
