absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
seriously iPhone. stop autocorrecting all my fucks into ducks. you're making all my strong worded texts look harmless and adorable.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
Randomize
