nut hugger
This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
I need moral support for this bender
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
This is my life. Enjoy the view
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
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