Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
Randomize
