It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
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