Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
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