This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
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