First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
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