dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
Randomize
