So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
