What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
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