i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
Randomize
