So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
