If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
I have enough bourbon in me to put Justin's cat in the dishwasher.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
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