Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
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