There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
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