we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
Randomize
