I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
don't judge my taste in strippers
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
Randomize