Dual....:-)
Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
I'm always down for nudity.
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
