Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
Randomize
