I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
Randomize
