you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
