this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
You dont lie about slip and slides
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
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