I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
I wish life had little blips of pornography
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
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