so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
Randomize
