Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
Randomize
