I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
Randomize
