There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
Randomize
