chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
Randomize
