just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
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