That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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