I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
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