so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Randomize
