I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
I am mentally ready for anal.
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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