I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
Randomize
