I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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