There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Randomize
