Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
Randomize
