I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
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