Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Randomize
