I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
i just walked in on my sister drunkenly sobbing to sarah mclachlan. its time for an intervention.
didn't that happen to you last weekend?
shut up.
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
Randomize
