did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Theres a handprint of sauce on my fridge, one on my face, and a trail of it leading to my bedroom, and sauce all in my bed, and I have no idea what the fuck i ate.
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
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