We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
Actions speak louder than pants.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Randomize
