This dress was meant to end up on your floor
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
Randomize
