one might say we're banned from that church
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
I accidentally asked my mom for a blowjob because 'mom' and 'molly' are next to each other in my address book.
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize
