i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
Randomize
