I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
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