It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
Randomize