i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
Randomize
