remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
where are my eyebrows?
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
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