If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
Randomize